{ july }

We got the puppy. 

She is a good baby girl. That is to say, she has a wonderful puppy temperament, even if it means getting up at 4:30 am.  She is patient and sweet with the girls, and needs just the right amount of attention. Lottie has plenty of personality and is quite vocal, emitting baby chewbacca sounds that make me giggle. Her fur is soft and downy and her tongue is like velvet.  

And she has giant paws. Gulp.  Lottie isn't going to be little for that long. 

But, OH, that FACE.  I melt.

(and she just peed on the floor. damn.)

-------

July is a struggle for me. It always will be. I take it day by day. And most days, hour by hour. I know that others have forgotten...or they don't realize that the anticipation of that nightmare's anniversary has been eating away at me for weeks already. Or how it effects everyday life.

There is a scorching pain in my chest that climbs into my throat and threatens to creep out of my eyes in a flood of tears pretty much every day. It takes a lot of energy and breathing to keep ahead of it.  

Especially with three girls ...and a puppy.

Exhale. 

Comments

[Sarah]

I haven't forgotten, sweets. Holding you in my heart this month and every month. Squeeze everyone for me, including that puppy.

[Rachel]

February is my July. Hugs and prayers for you.

[stacy]

You've been on my mind, friend. Sending you strength, love, light and peace during this time and always. ♥

[jess]

We haven't forgotten.
You're in lots of peoples's thoughts right now.

[julie]

What a sweet puppy! We recently added a puppy to our family and named her Dottie. I wish I could say I am liking her temperament... she is quite defiant at times and I am hoping that puppy class will turn that around. I have followed your blog for quite some time and I am thinking and praying for you.

[Carlota Bernal Shewchuk]

Such an adorable puppy, Lottie is!

Now that I know what you went through, I will be thinking of you every July.

Take heart, dear Christina!

[Kriste]

((hugs!!))