{ hello }

I have good days and bad days.  By good, it means I've had a day with few tears and plenty of smiles.  I see people and talk to friends and feel productive.  Meals are cooked and laundry is done and I check things off the to do list.

On other days I turn inward and it's not pretty.  The rest of the world has continued on with life and mine is forever changed.  I haven't yet figured out what the days are supposed to feel like. 

It's tempting to curl up in a ball under the sheets and just let it out.  I journal a lot.  I cry a lot. 

Today I went to visit the children's memorial butterfly garden for some quiet.  It was 70 degrees and sunny, a gorgeous fall day. Darcy's brick was installed a couple weeks ago.  It rests on a brick path surrounded by trees and native plants, just past a vine-covered arbor. It is a beautiful spot.

I sat on a bench and listened to the waterfall.  There were families playing at the nearby playground. The sound was bittersweet.

{ p.s. }

(This month I am also posting over at habit .)