{ a heavy heart }

It's been quiet here at the Fence this week.  My heart has been occupied with thoughts and prayers (oh, so many!) for three month old Audrey Elizabeth Pearce (via caring bridge). 

What started out as a fairly routine visit to the pediatrician to check for reflux issues ended this family in St. Louis Children's Hospital about three weeks ago, "diagnosed with ALCAPA--Anomalous Left Coronary Artery to the Pulmonary Artery--meaning that her left coronary should be attached to her Aorta, but was attached to her Pulmonary Artery."   It is very rare.  

My husband and I went to school with Audrey's Dad, Matt, and his parents are friends of my in-laws. I remember hearing the news in December that little Audrey was born. I have never met his wife, Yvette, but if I ever do I will surely burst into tears.  Her journal is hands-down one of the most raw and heartbreaking things I have ever read.  And it is, at the same time, also one of the most beautiful.  Her strength and faith are humbling.  I have said to hubs so many times this week, I don't think I could do it.  I would be in the corner, crying my eyes out.  Take me instead.  Please.... 

( I have a lot of growing to do. )

An excerpt from today's journal entry:

"It's almost 2p.  I have been asked to leave the room.  They are setting up a sterile field for Audrey.  I lean over her and kiss her face, stroke her hair, and whisper so gently in her ear that I love her and that she can do it.  She has such a beautiful little mouth, and those eyes..they smile at you when she's happy.  Do you know anyone that smiles with their eyes when they are happy?  I think that is a gift.  It shows that someone is truly joyful on the inside.  So here I go once again to the conference room.  Red dividers up;unit closed...."

Can you imagine?

They closed up her chest today and she is fighting an enormous blood clot that needs to dissolve, less it dislodges and causes all sorts of problems.  By all accounts, the doctors are pleased with the closing procedure today and she has had 24- 48 hours without any serious setbacks.  These are all good things, but she is still hooked up to a ventilator and being infused with eight medications....

I'm praying for Audrey.  And for her amazing parents.  And their two other kids.  And the doctors.  

And when I'm not doing that, I'm trying to clean house.  Apparently you have to stay on top of that or it takes over and sends the dust bunnies out to get you.  (Like those rabbits in Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail.  I'm serious.)

Comments

[Courtney]

Oh Chris, what a sad story. I'll keep her family in my thoughts and prayers.

[Nancy]

That little excerpt you posted brought me to tears. It is a great reminder to me to not take my kids for granted for a day!!!! I'm off to hug my sleeping sweet babies now!

[mary-The Calico Cottage]

I will certainly keep little Audrey in my prayers...very sad indeed.

[mary]

I will keep them in my prayers. My heart goes out to that family.

[Cara]

I'm pregnant with my first, and though I'm a firm believer that you always have the strength to do what you have to do... I can't imagine.

[Tennille]

Stories like these break my heart and put things in perspective for me. Thank you for sharing her story. I'm saying a prayer for her.

[laeroport]

Heartwrenching.....
Our friend Gibson also has a caring bridge page and recently had a second brain surgery to try to help with his rare seizure disorder. Thanfully, he's home now and back to his old self. We will keep Audrey in our prayers. :)
I don't think I could do it either....

[gina e]

Oh God no. Not our Matt Pearce. I feel sick right now. I'm sitting here complaining about my annoying kids. At least they are healthy. Thanks for sharing Chris.

[Stacy]

Prayers said before posting this.

[sarah]

oh my. sending prayers to your friends, and you. xx

[Nikki]

They are definitely in my thoughts. My daughter was a heart baby too. 10 years later she is going strong but boy those first few weeks were rough!