This is the door to the church in Old Downtown that I pass every day. Monday morning I had noticed the tulips had bloomed, all full and bright and flirty. So yesterday I made sure to bring my trusty camera on the way to preschool, praying that the previous night's crazy storms hadn't beaten those pretty tulips to a pulp. As you can see, they did just fine. Better than fine, really. The rain made everything dewy and lush.
Sometimes I think about the crazy storms in my life, when I wasn't sure if I would be happy again. Mostly, the time I spent as a single mom after my divorce. Standing before a judge and wetting myself, scared, knowing someone else had control over my life with my daughter; shaking and burning up inside, alone, 1700 miles away from my family. Dropping my grocery bag, sending the milk and eggs across my driveway -- and not knowing how I was going to feed my kid now since I had just used my last $6 until payday and the support checks didn't come. Coming to terms that a full-time working single-mom didn't have time to date and I wasn't probably ever going to marry again. Or have more kids. Or anything. Hiding in my laundry room, crying, ashamed of my depression and not wanting my little girl to see mommy so sad. It broke me down, those years.
There are several years of my life I keep tucked safely away... pretty much the year leading up to my divorce to the day I was granted the Court's permission to move home to the Midwest with my daughter. Almost 7 years, total. And there are several details I don't ever want my daughter to read, so I can't post them here.
But today? Ten years later? I am doing just fine, too. Better than fine. Life is sweet. The tears are happy ones. And I'm stronger and thankful and hell-bent on enjoying every minute. Had I not married in haste the first time, I might not have ended up marrying the love of my life.
(In fact, had Dwayne T. not asked me go to prom with him, thus preventing me from accepting Mr Pink's invitation 18 years ago, I might not be married now, either. Because we might have ended up dating then... and breaking up...and not marrying later after we'd 'growed up' a bit. Life has a funny way of working out.) And if you could follow *that* despite the careless pronouns and conditional phrasing, wow.
I never thought I'd look back on my Past (complete with stacks of scary legal documentation) and think I'm a lucky gal. But I am. Today is that much sweeter for it.
I didn't mean for this to be a lemonade from lemons kind of post, but it is. Alison tagged for one over the weekend and lookee what happened. I'm not good at tagging people for memes, but I like this one. I'm supposed to tag 6, but cut it short at 3. So Rachel, Jade, & Lori, consider yourself tagged. You're welcome. ;)
* Copy and paste these rules to your blog post.
* Link back to person who tagged you.
* Write about an incident in your life you first thought was really bad, but ended up being a blessing.
* Tag six ( I only did 3) random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
* Let each person you tagged know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.